Tag Archives: Life Lessons

There Will Be Miracles – Our Dementia Story

Inspiration, , ,

There Will Be Miracles – Our Dementia Story. We cherish precious moments. Specific flashes of time out of time. These moments feel eternal in the way they abide within us. We know we will remember them forever. When we require their return to our present life we are able to illuminate them with the floodlight of our imaginations. These are our personal miracles.

The Usual Definition of a Miracle. Expansive adjectives most often describe the miraculous. Extraordinary. Amazing. Outstanding. Inexplicable. Improbable. These words lead us to expect earth-shaking events. Burning bushes or parting seas. Let us reconsider these impressions.

In her Memoir Ordinary Times Nancy Mairs Says… “I always expect spiritual insights to shower like coins of light from on high. When instead they bubble up from the mire like will-of-the-wisps, I am invariably startled.”

Spiritual Insights are Glimpses of the Underneath of Life. Illumination of what is usually hidden. Veiled from view by the hustle of our days until we are somehow stopped for an instant of stillness. We may see then what is beneath the surface and truer than surface can ever be.

Such Moments are Miraculous. Imagine a floodlight. Recall when you have experienced an instant of brilliance seemingly out of nowhere. Always a welcome arrival. Urge the wattage of that brilliance to climb higher still. Luxuriate in the warmth of so much brightness. The surprise. The wonder. This has happened to me. There Will Be Miracles – Our Dementia Story.

Each of Us has Deposited these Moments in Our Memory Banks. Smiles that touch our hearts. Flashes of beauty beneath the retina of the inner eye. We can revitalize them in an instant. No intense pondering necessary. I consider this a miracle. A personal miracle accessible to my story and yours. Here is a simple exercise for accessing your personal miracles. I invite you to try it.

Grasp Your Memory Moment in Midair. Cradle it in the palm of your hand. Feel it ripple through your fingers. Follow as it moves up your arm and into your heart. Add to these inner sensations whatever surrounds you at this instant. Sounds. Scents. The touch of the air on your skin.

Revel in Sensual Richness Brought to Life. Drop gently out of the present. Loosen its hold on your spirit until you are fully embraced by your memory moment. Drop gently out of place. Travel wherever the incandescence of your imagination may carry you. Linger. Savor. Enjoy.

You Have Been Transported. Recognize the rapture. Edge aside whatever may attempt to distract you from your peace of mind. Do so gently, in order not to disturb the still place where your psyche allows itself to rest. When you are ready – gradually return to your now. Favor yourself with these interludes often.

Amidst Adversity Miracles Appear. This has been my experience and my blessing. Always unexpected. Often when most needed. A glimpse of light which fortifies and sustains. This exercise nurtures that ray of hope in my consciousness and enhances its glow. I share it with you.

Each of Us is a Repository of the Miraculous. All we need do is activate the amperage of our imaginations and direct that immense power within. The floodlight we each possess reveals our personal re-vision. I know this firsthand. There Will Be Miracles – Our Dementia Story.

LESSON LEARNED – Miracles are With Me Every Moment. Miracles are With You Too.

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You possess storytelling magic. Keep on writing whatever may occur.  Alice Orr. https://www.aliceorrbooks.com

Alice Orr is a number of things. Teacher. Storyteller. Former Editor and Literary Agent. Author of 15 novels, 2 novellas, a memoir, and No More Rejections: 50 Secrets to Writing a Manuscript that Sells. She blogs for writers and readers at https://www.aliceorrbooks.com.

Alice’s Memoir is titled Lifted to the Light: A Story of Struggle and Kindness. At the beating heart of this moving story a woman fights her own disease disaster. All her life she has taken care of herself. Now she faces an adversary too formidable to battle alone. An inspiring read available HERE.

Praise for Lifted to the Light: A Story of Struggle and Kindness: “I was lifted. I highly recommend this book as a can’t-put-down roadmap for anyone.” “Outstanding read. Very, very well written. Alice Orr is an amazing author.” “Honest, funny, and consoling.” “Ms. Orr is a fine, sensitive author and woman. I have read other books by her and am glad I haven’t missed this one.” “Couldn’t put it down.”

All of Alice’s Books are available HERE .

Ask Alice Your Crucial Questions. What are you most eager to know? About Alice and Jonathan’s experience? About telling your own stories? Ask your questions in the Comments section at the end of this post. Or email Alice at aliceorrbooks@gmail.com. She would love to hear from you.

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Speaking Falsehoods to Power – Our Dementia Story

Dementia Story, ,

Speaking Falsehoods to Power – Our Dementia Story. My husband is a charming man. I had no intention of remarrying before I met him. Tried it. Was miserable. My late Grandma’s wisdom spoke to me as it has so often. “Not for you” she said. Then there was Jonathan. The rest is a fifty-three-year story that began with his blue-eyed smile in 1972.

Grandma and Alice at Two and a Half

Nobody Wants a Dementia Diagnosis. Any of us would most likely use just about any means necessary to avoid hearing those words or reading those test results or facing those prospects. Jonathan’s means of avoidance was his charm.

My Wife Says I Forget Things. Do you know a single wife who does not contend that her husband forgets things? “My wife says I forget things.” That is what Jonathan told his young doctor. Then he smiled. Then they shared a chuckle.

We Needed a Referral for Testing. Jonathan’s charm target was our gateway to a world class neurology staff a half-dozen blocks from our home. We already had strong connections there. Jon would be treated as an individual instead of a case file there.

Early Detection was Crucial. The faster the professionals identify a disease the better it is for the patient. This is definitely true of dementia. Brain scan. Blood tests. Whatever they have in their diagnostic kitbag as ASAP as possible. Too bad Jon’s lifelong characteristic deployment of the dimples did his trick. His doc deemed no follow-up necessary. So much for ASAP at our nearby facility.

Finding a New Facility was Crucial. We live across the East River from Manhattan. I would have to search there. Lots of world class places. Huge. Formidable. Complex places. I was duly intimidated but waded in anyway. Across the river and into the medical bureaucracy.

Getting their Attention was Crucial. I faced a wall that seemed impregnable to me. A cheek-by-jowl array of massive structures and impersonal systems. These were the adversaries I was about to confront. I stared at that wall and felt myself shrink in significance by the second. Would they even notice me – much less hear my story?

Frustration Maximized my Motivation. It took hard-fought months to get into one of those massive facilities. On appointment day a waiting line overflowed the reception area into the lobby. It took nerve racking hours to get a brain scan scheduled. Too bad they could not fit us in for several weeks more. We needed a reroute back to the human dimensions of our neighborhood.

Sling Shot Time. I was no match for the powerful arm of the big city medical establishment. I could feel the fist at the end of that arm clenched above me. I could foresee that fist pounding my insignificant self and our predicament to bits. David had a sling and some pebbles to wield against Goliath. I had my will and some wiliness.

I Began to Obfuscate. I cannot say I lied. Grandma is up there listening. She would return from her resting place and rebuke me for a lie. Obfuscate is a safer term for what I did from then on with almost every gatekeeper I encountered. Never in person. They could not see my trembling limbs and terrified eyes as I was Speaking Falsehoods to Power – Our Dementia Story.

I Obfuscated Creatively. First I only faked a doctor referral – or maybe two. Next I pretended to be a doctor’s assistant. Altered my voice to sound medical. I guessed my ruses might be most effective at the end of the day when folks were tired. I did what I believed I had to do and it worked. Jonathan’s brain scan happened ASAP and where we needed it to happen. A half-dozen blocks from home.

I Never Got Over Being Terrified of Goliath. I was certain the powers that be would discover what I was doing. I told myself my motives were right and righteous. My beloved husband needed help as fast as we could get it. Nothing must stop that. Not my own trepidation. Certainly not the possibility of sanctions by my bureaucratic betters.

Jon’s Brain Scan Diagnosed Dementia. Treatment began and has proceeded positively so far. We focus on the hopefulness of that and on how much we love each other. Grandma is with us. She kisses the top of my head like she did when I was a little girl. She understands why – when necessary – her bigger girl will be Speaking Falsehoods to Power – Our Dementia Story.

LESSON LEARNED – GET YOUR LOVED ONES WHAT THEY NEED AND DESERVE. Remember David. Find yourself a sling. Drop your determination into it. Steady your knocking knees. Take your shot.

**********

You possess storytelling magic. Keep on writing whatever may occur. AliceOrr  https://www.aliceorrbooks.com

Alice Orr is a number of things. Teacher. Storyteller. Former Editor and Literary Agent. Author of 15 novels, 2 novellas, a memoir, and No More Rejections: 50 Secrets to Writing a Manuscript that Sells. She also blogs for writers and readers at https://www.aliceorrbooks.com.

Alice’s Memoir is titled Lifted to the Light: A Story of Struggle and Kindness. At the beating heart of this moving story a woman fights her own disease disaster. All her life she has taken care of herself. Now she faces an adversary too formidable to battle alone. An inspiring read available HERE.

Praise for Lifted to the Light: A Story of Struggle and Kindness: “I was lifted. I highly recommend this book as a can’t-put-down roadmap for anyone.” “Outstanding read. Very, very well written. Alice Orr is an amazing author.” “Honest, funny, and consoling.” “Ms. Orr is a fine, sensitive author and woman. I have read other books by her and am glad I haven’t missed this one.” “Couldn’t put it down.”

All of Alice’s Books are available HERE .

Ask Alice Your Crucial Questions. What are you most eager to know? About Alice and Jonathan’s experience? About telling your own stories? Ask your questions in the Comments section at the end of this post. Or email Alice at aliceorrbooks@gmail.com. She would love to hear from you.

http://facebook.com/aliceorrwriter/
http://twitter.com/AliceOrrBooks/
http://goodreads.com/aliceorr/
http://pinterest.com/aliceorrwriter/

 

 

 

Why A CHRISTMAS CAROL Sings

Inspiration, ,

A Christmas Carol Sings to Me because I Long to Decode its Secret. Why does this story grasp my heart and refuse to let go, no matter how many times I experience it? How has it continued to hold that same power for so long over a vast audience? What did Charles Dickens do that keeps us returning again and again? Let me venture some guesses.

A Christmas Carol Sings because of Ebenezer Scrooge. Charles Dickens created a character we are unable to resist. Ebenezer commands us to revisit the dark chill of his “money-changing hole” with astonishing regularity. We simply cannot get enough of him, or the twisting and twisted trail he leads us along.

A Christmas Carol Sings because it is a Ghost Story. Things that go bump in the night abound. Literally, as Jacob Marley’s chain of miser’s sins clanks toward Scrooge’s cold, barren rooms. On film, I personally favor the Alastair Sim version. The gloomy black and white images and ominous soundtrack most accurately evoke the mood of the book for me, while Ebenezer’s angry scowl draws us all into dread and melancholy.

A Christmas Carol Sings because there is some Ebenezer in most of us. Not because we hoard and hover over our worldly goods, or grumble, “Humbug this, humbug that,” for all to hear. But because, as surely as Scrooge carries his poisonous, punishing temper everywhere, he carries wounds as well, and so do we.

A Christmas Carol Sings because those Wounds are to our Hearts. As was true for Scrooge, hurts are inflicted on us in our tenderest places, usually when we’re very young. Hot cinders of malice, neglect, unkindness, or worse are dropped, one by one, singing a hollow that begs  to be filled by love, which is in turn denied or simply unavailable.

A Christmas Carol Sings because we struggle mightily with our own ghosts. Some of you may not be haunted in this way nor have suffered wounds to the heart. If this is true, I rejoice for you. Still, I suspect that, more often than not, we bear up bravely beneath our injuries and scar them over as best we can.

A Christmas Carol Sings because Ebenezer Offers Us Choices. He exemplifies the  capacity within us to live afflicted, or to heal. Before the spirits visit him, he vividly embodies the former choice and its accompanying  bitterness. Afterward, he shows us another way to go, but action will be required, as in all Redemption stories. This is one of those for sure, and the required action is love in its working verb form.

A Christmas Carol Sings because it Reminds us of a Crucial Truth. One prescription for healing our wounds is to love, deeply and consistently as possible, given our flawed human natures. if we  listen, we may hear the still, small voices within us echo the goodness of that intention.And, like A Christmas Carol, those voices sing.

Meanwhile… Charles Dickens, Ebenezer, Tiny Tim, and I wish each of you a beloved and loving New Year.

Alice Orr – www.aliceorrbooks.com

Alice Orr’s Christmas story A Vacancy at the Inn – Riverton Road Romantic Suspense Series Book 3 – is available on Amazon HERE. Enjoy!

A Time of Fear & Loving – Riverton Road Romantic Suspense Series Book 5 – is available HERE.  Praise for A Time of Fear & Loving. “Alice Orr is the queen of ramped-up stakes and page-turning suspense.” “Warning. Don’t read before bed. You won’t want to sleep.” “The tension in this novel is through the roof.” “I never want an Alice Orr book to end.” “The best one yet!” “Budding romance sizzles in the background until it ignites with passion.”

Look for all of Alice’s books HERE.

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